HELL-O,

this time the little oinker asked for a toy what we really hated:

That evil has a name:

BARBIE

IMG_0762

the first one appeared in my mommas crib as one of her aunts thought, that my mom needs REAL girl-toys, because in her opinion my mom was a tom boy. What a bullsh*t, my mom WAS Pocahontas that time and Pocahontas was a girl, or not? Or what?

Butt anyway. Barbie entered my mom’s crib on a birthday and in old times kids were encouraged to lie, what was called respecting  adult peeps and so my mom has to pretend joy and happiness…

Barbie landed in a toybox where she had to live alone like a plastic-spider in a cellar and far away from luxury trash like a penthouse or a pink convertible. Butt not for long, Ken appeared on Christmas, because the middlename of that aunt was Cruella and the name says it all for that pawson.

IMG_0766

Probably Barbie and Ken would stay in that toybox furever and ever… thanks Overlook Twins, nice try,  grab that two freaks and play with them furever&ever…

otwins

…and where were we? Oh, yes, Barbie and Ken rotted along in that box till one day a boy entered the crib of my momma. No, not what you may think, they were ~11 years old and… hold your breath… my mom was condemned to help that guy with learning. Yes, no joke.

IMG_0765

That boy was a doofus (he really was, he wrote in a class essay he wants to sit in a traffic light  when he is adult where he will push the buttons for the red, yellow and green light. he was 13 years old, howly crap!) –   and instead to learn together with my mom he sniffed around and found the toybox with the two misconstructions made by Mattel. He removed Barbies clothes and then he used Barbies boobs like a chewing toy . Probably this guy was the first fan of fake boobs long before it was common to get fake mole hills  in front of  your chest via nip&tuck.

IMG_0772 OFF WITH YOUR HEAD!

IMG_0770 what a whimp,look,  he immediately sh*t in his pants!

My momma laughed, but my granny was disappointed and said something about precocity and she stopped this learning lessons immediately (YAY! Granny!). And she told that aunt that gifts with tits are banned now in their crib (Double YAY! Granny!). The aunt agreed and my mom got a GIRL WITHOUT TITS on her next birthday…

IMG_0768 GIRL WITHOUT TITS

Some peeps are a dead loss…

IMG_0767

…and one for the road…well that’s what I call embarrASSing…

IMG_0773

 

HAVE A FUNNY TUESDAY ALL

About easyweimaraner

Weimaraner /Braque de Weimar, born in 2009, male & fabulous From: Britanny / France Likes: Plushtoy-Shredding, Spikebones,long distance Walks, everyday a Gift, Chicken, Shoes, Underwear, my squeekie Pig & my whole Life Dislikes: Water, Cats, Beaf, Cats, cleaning my Ears, Cats, the Vet, Cats, Snow & CATS! Profession: Student of psychological War-technics & Terrorism, after my Masterdegree i become to rule the world or maybe to be the owner of toys r us. actually i'm not sure... Status: Single Pets: Hell, NO! i prefer a petfree home. but owner of two slaves for my comfy Misc.: Greencardowner for Masterbed, Master of Beggin, Prince of Thiefs We decided to leave Easy's datas as they were... although we lost him in november 2016, he is still with us.... and his little brothers Phenny and Nelly promised to write on not as Easy the weim, but as easy Weimaraner... About us: Mr. Phoenix, born 9/9/2016 a virgo and always clever&smart...Neilson, born 7/28/2017 a leo who thinks he is clever&smart...

68 responses »

  1. scrapydo says:

    I feel with you! You have to taste these strange play things!

  2. My amigurumis are much more fun to play with! I am making a staffy terrier a square knitted fox as I type. You sorted those silly plastic things Easy! 😀

  3. that last guy looked to much like Yanni – off with hi head !

  4. Princess Leah says:

    And all Mum really needed was YOU Easy, to show Aunty what Mum thought of those prezzies! I finks a swift chew to remove their head would have done the trick!
    Loves and licky kisses
    Princess Leah xxx

  5. fredrieka says:

    Oh be careful not eat Barbie her ego is inflated it may give you indigestion

  6. My Mom had very “mixed emotions” about Barbie…….Mom thought she was supposed to look like Barbie and that was NEVER going to happen…..Barbie was some kind of plastic surgery NIGHTMARE. Anyway, Mom hid her Barbie in the bottom of her toy box and it stayed there for years. We’re not too sure about that long-haired Yanni looking doll – but he looks quite edible. Ken was kind of a wimp and let Barbie push him around too much….shame on him. I think you’re right to take a bit of a taste of ALL of them though…..!!

    Hugs, Sammy

  7. DailyMusings says:

    Who is that last doll with the hair??? I can’t believe you still have your Barbie and Ken- I also had Midge but cut her red hair into a pixie which made my sister cry. Oh the Barbie memories! 😀

    • I only have some of this monsters, the most things landed in the trashcan… specially the dolls who got a pixie too :o) It was nearly impossible to give that girl a new look, all ended with a pixie :o)

  8. Emmadog says:

    My mom has her Barbie collection upstairs in a box. She still loves these silly plastic weirdos! I don’t get the attraction.

  9. I wasn’t crazy about Barbie but she has a cool car! My Barbie dolls all rode the plastic horses I collected.. 😀 I love that your Mom is a tomboy!!!!

  10. dogdaz says:

    I used to tear the heads off of my dolls and put them on other ones, and no, I did not turn out to be a surgeon or a mass murderer. TOM BOYS rule!!!! – Lorian of DogDaz Zoo

  11. This was funnier than shit! Really the kid started chewing on the boobs, wth! Easy you always make me laugh, chewing the head off! Have a great day, thanks for the smile.

  12. Mom played with Barbies for hours as a little girl and loved it, things sure have changed! Love Dolly

  13. PigLove says:

    I.can’t.breathe. I’m snorting and rolling with laughter here so much. That was awesome brother! Barbies were right up there with Cabbage Patch kids with my mom. XOXO – Bacon

  14. Kismet says:

    You’re an intact dog. You have one thing on your mind. Just saying….

  15. Brian says:

    Maybe we could have a little shrimp on the Barbie!

  16. Frankie and Ernie says:

    DESPITE the attempts to make your mom somethingy…. she clearly was NOT… we are glad that she Stuck by her PRINCIPLES and steered clear of those plastic peeple. They clearly would have warped her development… and we would NOT have wanted THAT… We like her JUST the way she is…
    We think that you should BEHEAD the Evil ones… for they surely are an EmBareA$$ment to the world.

    • I so agree with you, that plastic people and their whole pinky world is so much not our world…and I’m glad that Barbie and her gang play now with the Overlook Twins furever and ever :o)

  17. Two French Bulldogs says:

    BOL you chewed the privates!
    Lily & Edward

  18. cecilia07 says:

    OMDs Easy this cracked us up…if you only knew what my mom and human sis did on 12/24!! Let’s just say my sis is about 30+ years past playing with Barbies…But each time my mom mentioned getting rid of the two ginormous boxes of Barbies and Barbie clothes Sis would get misty eyed. Lo and Behold this was the year Sis was ready to sort through the boxes to revisit her childhood once again. Unfortunately no photos as sis is camera shy but ever last one of the Barbies were nekked when they opened the box. But long story short…the sorting began. Mom washed all the Barbie clothes. Very soon the nekked Barbies and clothes will be given to a young friend of our family who loves Barbies.
    Hugs madi your bff

    • I understand your sister. My momma kept all her toys and my grandpawrents were condemned to storage all that boxes. Until a day in summer 2011, where my granny loaded all that trashures in the car and brought it to my momma. Now we have all that stuff on our attic and it looks like the remake of toy story :o)

  19. cecilia07 says:

    PS mom said to tell you our first family pet, Toto the mighty mini Doxie, was a ‘leg man’ he could often be found chewing on Barbie legs…which made sis scream like crazy

  20. Midwestern Plant Girl says:

    I never had a barbie or any other dolls. I would have probably chewed them up also!

  21. Easy, you never fail to make us laugh!! So . . . did you learn anything from the butt sniff?

    Your Pals,

    Murphy & Stanley

  22. hahaha…Easy, your mom’s experience with Barbie are similar to our mom’s. She never was a doll girl…more like a, dare I say it,….boy. No she didn’t pee like a boy but she was into toys like guns and such. Running around like a wild beast. So Barbie sat in the bedroom until one day she disappeared. Mom never thought about till now….maybe Barbie is plastic glitter now.

    (((Shoko)))

    • bet that barbie ran away to the pink cadillac ranch … or she went to Vegas :o) my momma liked it more to play in the mud or to look for trashures on the street. And for such games Barbie wasn’t prepared with her high heels :o)

  23. Ha haa Haa! Mom was never a Barbie fan but some of the grandgirlpeeps were.
    The only doll mom had was Betsy Wetsy. She would play Bonanza and Mom thought she was married to big HOSS and Betsy was their baby. Her sister wanted to be married to Little Joe. OMD! how silly was that
    hugs
    Mr Bailey & Hazel

  24. susieandsidebite says:

    Thats the best thing every done with a Brabie & Ken….welll maybe target pratice in the back yrad…our Mom HATED THEM THINGS.

    The Mad Scots

  25. harrispen says:

    Our mom never saw much in Barbie and Ken either. Your stories always bring us a big laugh.

  26. Lady Lilith says:

    Looks like dolls aren’t’ only for girls.

  27. DezizWorld says:

    OMC Easy we don’t even know where to begin. MOL Guess weez’ll just say dat girl wiff out tits looks purretty manly. MOL And second, a boy of 13 shuldn’t be chewin’ on da tits of any toy. Weez just don’t know what to fink ’bout dat. But Barbie shuld be worff sum gween papers today, maybe yous mommy kuld twade her in and get yous sumfin’. 🙂

    Luv ya’

    Dezi and Lexi

  28. Hope your family is feeling better Easy. My Mom wasn’t a Barbie fan either. She had the Lone Ranger and Tonto with their horses!

  29. Crikey Easy ……. you’ve done it again. Mum’s rollin’ on the floor, again!!

  30. Poor Barbie. I loved Barbie and now have a room with lot of them in boxes up on a shelf in our crib. Glad no one has come to chew on them…lol.

  31. Angel Pip & Ruby says:

    Bawhahahahahahahaha! Way to show Barbie who’s boss!

    Wishing you and your family a healthy and happy 2015!

  32. Barbie is (apart from being just plain creepy) so unrealistic for all little kids. I see there was a new ‘kid in town’ called Lammily who is normal sized and better role for kids. Hopefully other toy manufacturers will take note as well. Or…risk the opportunity to become nice chew toys! Bwahahah. Have a safe, warm and happy New Year!

  33. kolytyi says:

    In my country, Barbie was practically unknown for most children when I was a child. What a relief!!! I was a kind of tomboy, too, my favorite pastime was playing football with two of my friends.

  34. My daughter had Barbies but she knew what’s what. On Halloween, she took their heads off, painted red nail polish on their necks and made a scary Halloween display in our family room window. That’s my girl!

    –Wags (and purrs) from Life with Dogs and Cats.

  35. Mumsy's Little Chancy Man says:

    We came by to wish you all a Very Happy New Year and we hope that 2015 will be filled with love, happiness, good health, all you need to live comfortably and lots of hugs and nose kisses! Looking forward to reading more of your great posts in 2015 sweet Easy. We love all the laughs you give us and we love you all. We hope you all have nothing but wonderful things come your way in 2015. Hugs and nose kisses Maggie, Chancy and family

  36. Hawk aka BrownDog says:

    Hi Y’all!

    BOL! You are too funny, Easy!

    Wishing you and yours a safe and healthy New Year!

    Happy New Year!
    Hawk aka BrownDog

  37. rumpydog says:

    I wouldn’t mind chewing on one of those myself! Happy New Year, Easy! woo woo woo!

  38. dorysbackyard says:

    BOL…Easy, we think your Mama is pawesome!!!
    Happy New Year’s Smileys!
    Dory, Jakey, Arty & Bilbo

  39. We were never big into Barbie or Ken for that matter…go ahead and chew them we say 😉

  40. Wishing you and your pawrents a way happier and healthier new year. Just got your comment which means you are almost at 2015!!! It’s still too early to break out the champagne here.

  41. rottwlrmom says:

    Oh Easy! Thank you for the laughs!!! I hope you have a wonderful 2015 my good man! And take care of yer Ma and Pa!

  42. amkuska says:

    You’re supposed to attach them to fireworks, not chew them. 😛

  43. catfromhell says:

    Mes laughed and laughed – yous knows my Mommy is called Barbie by her furrends…
    Mes had a great time at the pawty, me hairy slobbery sister thinks yous the coolest guy she’s ever met!
    ♪ღ♪*•.¸¸¸.•*¨(¯`’•.¸(♥)¸.• ’´¯)¨*•.¸¸¸.•*•♪ღ♪•**•.
    H░A░P░P░Y░N░E░W░Y░E░A░ R░2015░
    ♪ღ♪*•.¸¸¸.•*¨¨*•.¸¸¸.•*•♪ღ ♪¸.•*¨¨*•.¸¸¸.•*•♪ღ♪•
    Kisses
    Nellie

  44. katiebblogs says:

    Easy you are always good for the laughs, even with a slight NYE hangover 😉 Happy New Year to you Easy and to your family! xo

  45. Tootsie says:

    This is pawsome! Mom’s human mom used to behead dolls and put them on top of the fence. She could have used your help!

    Buon anno e tanti auguri!

    xox
    Tootsie

  46. Mom never had a Barbie and is still not a fan of Barbie. We think beheading might be in order!!

    Happy New Year! We hope 2015 is a healthy and happy one for you.

    The Florida Furkids

  47. My Mom was out of doll play when Barbie showed up. Mom played with and loved her dolls lots…all looked like little girls, just like Mom and her friends. Ginny dolls were her favorite and she still has many of them. I agree Easy, Barbie deserves to have her head chomped off, but Mattel even more

  48. I don’t understand how Barbie can be so popular when little girls don’t like to play with them! I had them and didn’t play with them much either. Seriously, she was invented the year I was born and she has had like a gazillion jobs! What’s up with that?!

  49. hello easy its dennis the vizsla dog hay wow those littel autons ar eeven kreepier then the big wuns on the faymus dokyoomentary doctor who!!! watch owt they ar not to be trusted!!! ok bye

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